Some time in the 1980s some person probably married and decided to make National Spouses’ Day a thing. Wait I know what you are thinking, don’t we have one of those and it’s called Valentine’s Day? Well actually yes and no. While Spouses’ Day is very much for what it implies, Valentine’s Day is more about love. Love between any two people. Spouses’ Day is about you and the person you’re married to or devoted your life to in a committed way.
I have always been a grouch about Valentine’s Day as it has some deep-seated pain attached to it as well as sweet memories come with some of that pain. So, I never was one for celebrating Valentine’s Day very much when I have had a spouse. I feel like I can really get behind this National Spouses’ Day now because obviously I think I have the best spouse in the entire world!!
I have learned many lessons in this new relationship with Jeremy. I learned more about what it means to have a true Spouse as well as how to be a true Spouse. I made a lot of relationship mistakes in the past but hopefully with age, and the loving push of my Spouse, my decisions are more productive and my mistakes are less.
While the term “spouses” involves us both, I want this to be about a man that I didn’t know I wanted or needed. Jeremy from the first day we said hello has been nothing but kind, loving, gentle, and supportive. That last one was the one that I longed for a lot. I knew the part of my past relationship that thrived was the part where I was being supported emotionally. Having someone on your side always helps someone to feel all the other parts of a healthy relationship. My Jeremy showed me what having faith in someone can really do. In fact, I would not be writing to you today if not encouraged by Jeremy to follow my dreams of writing even if just for now it is contained in a blog. Jeremy from day one never pushed unless I needed it. He never tried to pressure me to make decisions I was not ready for. He understood when I said no that it meant no. He was there with open arms waiting for me to be ready to move forward.
Jeremy is the kind of man that I would not have purposely chosen for myself. Everyday though I find myself finding things about him that I love more and more. Now don’t get me wrong, as most of you know you can think your spouse walks on water and still get upset at them for some of the dumbest reasons. Last night I was being me and asking way too many questions and Jeremy began to be a bit of a butt hole and I was like I’m so pissed at you. He just smiled. He knew that even me saying I was pissed didn’t mean I loved him less or thought bad about him. With that smile, I was full face hosed down by the light of the smile and not pissed at all anymore. He has that effect on me.
I will have been with Jeremy for three years and six months by the time you’re reading this. He has caused me so many positive deep-seated thoughts and introspectiveness into who I am and who I want to be. I think a good spouse causes you to ask questions and leads you in a direction that you naturally should be in. Good spouses also do not make you change who you are so much you do not recognize yourself. I spent a lot of time lost in the world of my ex, not knowing where or who I was. Thanks to that you are blessed with Findingevie. So, I guess even that worked out. The thing is though, what it boils down to is to be yourself. I found that for Jeremy and I, it’s listening to each other and not trying to change the thoughts of each other. It is also understanding why Jeremy is rather quiet and likes it to all just be better and I like to talk everything out. Then each taking a page from each other’s book and meeting in the middle.
National Spouses’ Day will be a day that I make absolutely sure Jeremy knows how well loved he is. I’ll make him feel like the king of his domain because he is. He spends so much time working, looking after me, and running after the boys and all their demands. He forgets to take time for himself sometimes. I hope today (or rather this weekend) I can make it where Jeremy gets to have Jeremy time and know exactly how lucky I feel to have him as a spouse. I love you, thank you for being the best spouse I could ever ask for.
Tell me how this day will be special for you in the comments, I can’t wait to hear about it!
XOXO, Evie
Finding Evie 