Blog Series: Internet Relationships #12: Catfishing

Everyone knows Catfishing is not the hobby of yesterday sitting on the banks with a pole waiting for a bite. NOPE, it’s normally a predator looking to hook you on the promise of love so whatever it is they’re trying to steal from you is within their reach. However, sometimes Catfishing happens in a way that you almost can’t get mad at the person. 

Catfishing can occur for many reasons. People want to steal money from you, they want to get revenge on you, and sometimes they really just want to be loved.  I have a catfishing story. One I am not proud of but it is how I learned the real lesson before it was a thing. 

A young 19-year-old Evie was desperate to make some connections with anyone really that would tell her they loved her. I wanted just one guy to want me. I began chatting on web tv and soon found myself a 20-year-old still chatting. Till one day a guy started talking to me. Said he had a webcam if I wanted to talk on cam. I told him I didn’t have a cam because I didn’t. He said that’s ok, but it is easier if I had you on my computer to chat. I was like ok. So, I sat there on my side of the computer using voice and he had opened his camera to me. He was exactly who he said he was, a guy that was in the army, and would soon be shipped overseas. 

I had shown him a picture or two of me but it was when I was a teenager. Still fat, just not as fat as I currently was. He had told me I was beautiful and he liked my body. I had started talking to him about the idea of being his pen pal via the internet. Back then there was a site you could go to and be paired with a soldier. We had hit it off because he had trained in a local town near me. We kept talking about how we could have run into each other etc.  He talked a lot about duty and his friends who would come in and out of where he was on the computer. 

I really liked him. He would sing to me, and just talk to me as long as he could. He said he loved my voice. One day he says to me I want to send you a webcam. I was like nooo you can’t do that. I won’t take it, save your money. He said to me he thought he was falling in love with me and it was insane since all he had was these two pictures of me. He said well tough, I already bought it all I need is your address. Well by this time I knew I was stuck. I said just keep that one, I’ll go buy one and we can cam tomorrow. I made sure I looked super nice, but honestly, all the lipstick in the world was not going to cover the fact I was about 300 lbs. more than I weighed in the pictures he was shown. So, I set up the cam and he calls. He comes on first and then I do. It took him a minute to realize. He was all happy saying hey baby finally and his words just hung in the air. I said hi, I guess you can figure out why I didn’t want to come on cam. He said um yea I guess so. 

I was so totally shy back then. I didn’t know what to do or say. I was so embarrassed. He later took his cam off and said to me look, I don’t find myself attracted to big women. I can’t believe you let me start having feelings for you. Of course, my poor broken heart all I could do is say how sorry I was and how I was trying to be thin. He didn’t care he was repulsed and after that, he hung up and blocked me. The end.

After that moment, I said I would never talk to anyone without them knowing how fat I really was. Which held out to be really weird conversation starters. Sure I have been catfished before (before I beat the system)… I won’t talk to you unless there is a live video saying my name and the date. I’m sure there are ways around that as well but for the most part, it helped me protect myself. 

Ladies let me just speak to you for a moment. Catfishing is weak, it is the worst kind of lie, because not only is it a lie it has the potential to really hurt people. There is no reason to lie about your size, race, preferences, or sexuality. All of it makes you, you and me, me. You are perfect as yourself and I promise there is someone out there that will love you just the way you need. 


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2 thoughts on “Blog Series: Internet Relationships #12: Catfishing

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