Remembering

Belle my tiny little Pomeranian, her life begins somewhere in the south and was shipped to a pet shop. Before you go off on me, I know I know you should never buy from pet shops. I know the wrongs of it, this was almost 15 years ago. It seems unreal to even type that. I was with my now ex-fiancé/husband and it was my first year in New York. I was supper lonely, not adjusting well and my pup back home was offal sick. So all that considered my ex set out to find me a pup.

We started off wanting to buy a St. Benard. How in the world did we end up with a Pomeranian, well on a last dich effort we randomly went into a pet store one cold Sunday in January. There were so many dogs. So many I fell in love with instantly. My ex went to a particular window and looked and there were three dogs all different breeds, and one was a pom-pom the three dogs only had miniature as a common dominator. Belle who we named on the way home, was beating up on the other two pups. One of which I wanted to see and of course the ex-wanted to see the pompom. I did not want a Pomeranian in fact I would have chosen any dog in there over her. Except that was not going to be the case. My ex fell in love with this dirty little cotton ball as he would soon call her. So, we checked out 1600$ for her and totally wiped out his credit card and mine. We did not know how we would eat the coming week but we know had a puppy…

When I tell you this little poof ball could feel I did not want her You must understand I was not a fan of the breed and no dog would ever be as perfect as my Sabrina back home. She cried all the way home till the ex could take her, she would proceed to potty train perfect until we would be alone and she would look at me and pee on the carpet. I was so mad at her I would just keep her locked in our kitchen and she learned to climb the gate, chew the wood panel and poop everywhere but her pad. I spent so much time on my hands and knees cleaning the carpets than I did anything else.   She terrorized me until the day I cried all day on the phone with my friend the day Sabrina passed away. I had let Belle run wild that day so I could just deal with loosing Sabrina and help my friend with the passing. After I hung up with my friend, and I was laying on the sofa with a blanket over me crying hard Belle set at my side begging to be picked up so I picked her up and put her on the sofa.

For the first time she come and got in my lap and was pushing up under my arm. So, I started petting her and telling her why I was crying. Somehow, she ended up on her back in my arms and I could smell her little feet that smelled just like Sabrina. Thus, the day I fell head over hills in love with Ms. Belle. After that day she never went bathroom on the floor any more, she started doing this cute trick of picking up the mail one piece at a time and carrying it over to me on the sofa or if I was in the be room. The ex, taught Belle to sit, stay, spin, flat. She really was very good at all her little demands.

Belle was a special girl. She did not bark until she was much older. She was playful, in fact I taught her to bring me the toy and hand it to me instead of dropping it. She loved to have clothes on. She had an entire wardrobe. When she was young, she loved the snow. Not so much when she was older. Something that never changed was Belle loved a good road trip or a long drive. She hated being groomed but up to 3 times a year she would semi allow me to cut her fur and clean her up. When she was young, she got baths constantly. Ill never forget walking in with the ex in the tub with her. I thought at the time how disgusting that was but via five/six years later Belle loved sitting on my tummy or thigh in the bath tub when I was soaking.

Bell has been to almost half of the United States. She is a road trip award winner. She was always so good, provided entertainment, and love. She did not like all people but boy did she have some favorites. She loved her uncle Frank but never did she love anyone as much as she loved her auntie, Liz. I believe I was a bit jealous. Belle was not a kid dog when she was young. She would be mostly nice until she had enough, but then she met my youngest niece and I am not sure if she was just older and did not have as much fight at the time or if there was a genuine connection.  Ok let us be honest the baby always tasted of whatever she was eating that day and too she loved feeding Belle.

I could literally sit here for hours typing out memories, ranging from super sad to pee your self funny. She was more than a dog, she was my child, my protecter, my confidant, and ill never forget the tiny paws, the little tongue, the super soft fur, to the eyes that seemed to speak for her. Deciding to put Belle to sleep was the hardest. She was sick having been on seizure meds for more than a few years, having dementia, to also having what we presumed was cancer, from the vet without testing. I did not want my little baby to suffer any more.

I do not know how to move on. I see Belle out the corner of my eye all the time. I think I hear Belle tap dancing around upstairs. She was a bright and shining star and she is gone now. Forever my little love, I miss you and love you so much. This took a long time for me to write because I cry so hard trying to type it out. Now it is done, this phase of my life documented.

                                                                  RIP my sweet Belle Aloysius  Noor.