Blog Series: Internet Relationships #11- The One Who Played Games With Men

To continue this little series we are doing on Internet relationships, we come back around to someone I have already spoken about and a topic we always blame men for doing. So let’s see how it goes when it’s not a man doing it. So, this lady was a huge part of my internet life – we will call her Liv. Liv was like a guru to all things plus size. She introduced me to clothing companies I had never heard of. Showed me sites I had not seen before. While a majority of our time spent together was fun and interesting, there was a dark part to our friendship. Liv was older than I was and I was seeking motherly approval. Because of that, I could not tell her no.

I soon started telling her everything and she very much liked to hear about the guys that would message me online. She knew I was talking to someone serious so the other people were either my friends or annoyances. I began to just send them to her if they wanted a free woman to talk to. I soon learned that she was someone that likes to toy with others’ emotions. 

There was this really nice man who happened to be into bigger women. He was married to a thin woman and was in fact expecting a baby. He and I had been online friends for quite some time even before he was married. He was extremely weird but kind. So, when I no longer had the time I asked him if he would like to talk to Liv. He said yes. Well, a few days later he dm’s me and asked if this (a topic that was sexual in nature) was true about my friend. I did not know. So, I dm’ed Liv and asked … She laughed and told me to tell him that in fact, it was true.  She would sometimes DM me and tell me to send certain pictures of me and she was going to make this guy think he was talking to me and her at the same time. I did not feel good about this at this time but like I said I could not tell her no. I was young and progressively worried about what everyone, even strangers felt about me and everything made me feel ugh. 

Soon I would go stay with Liv for a while. Over the next few days, I learned that she had two different “boyfriends”. One man had been to her home before with his family. He had moved to Canada in hopes that they would be able to live together and marry. Then there was a young guy who was trying to move to Canada who thought he was in a relationship with Liv. I felt most sorry for the first guy because I know he sent her lots of money and bought her gifts all the time. I also knew the young guy really cared for her as well. Each day she would have conversations with them both and in between she would talk to numerous other men but her favorite to “toy with” is the guy I had introduced her to. 

I would soon learn she used my photos occasionally to chat with men. She also was convincing me to let her record me saying stupid stuff and “trying to be provocative”.  Well thankfully it all ended with the guy I sent her way. Apparently one day he just went offline and didn’t speak to her anymore nor to me. I never got to tell that guy how sorry I was for my participation in the games Liv was playing. I should have never said yes to any of it. I hated that I was so naive to think no one would get hurt. 

I don’t know if the two boyfriends ever knew about each other or if Liv was ever honest about anything when it came to men. I have to agree with a friend who says, it is always portrayed that women are the victims but so easily men can be as well. If there are more “Liv’s” out there, I would reach out to you in particular and ask you to reconsider your actions. Being an online tease/bully is never something to be proud of. Liv is no longer with us but I know plenty of Liv’s out there. Don’t let that be you. xoxo

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